Education Initiative

Parental separation doesn’t have to mean poor outcomes for children, but the way that the separation is handled matters.

If we had a blank sheet of paper and were designing a package of support for a child whose parents are separating, that child’s school would of course play a fundamental role in that plan.

That’s why in 2025 we asked teachers across the UK what they are seeing on the ground when it comes to working with separated parents and outcomes for children. Here’s what we found:

We surveyed teachers across the UK.*

58% of teachers had seen school becoming a source of, or location for, conflict between separated parents

61% of teachers have experienced one parent trying to exclude the other from school communication

20% of teachers have experienced one parent trying to exclude the other, or members of their ex-partner’s family from picking up a child from school

37% reported being in situations of such high conflict between the parents that school is forced into a time consuming and stressful intermediary role

Less than 11% of teachers have had any training to understand children’s needs and rights in the context of separation

Only 38% of teachers were aware if their school had a policy for separated parents

Only 8% of teachers had a safeguarding lead that dealt with separation

Fewer than 6% of teachers have had any training on the legal aspects of children’s rights and needs in any family separation

*Data from The Parents’ Promise survey, 2025.

The 'Five to Thrive'

It can be hard to know what to prioritise with regards to children and making sure that they are OK. Here are five simple principles that parents and schools can focus on which we believe will provide the best platform for children to thrive after separation. We call them the ‘Five To Thrive’.

Communication

1. Holistic communication strategy

Parents and school should agree a joined-up communication strategy in which the parents have a transparent dialogue with the school around all school and home matters. No disagreements should be had at school or around the child(ren).

Friendship

2. Friendship groups

Parents and school should talk with each other about changes or concerns in the way the child’s friendship group may be changing or being impacted.

Attendance

3. School work and attendance

During a time of parental separation, there are additional pressures however schoolwork, homework and attendance will always be important. Parents and school to encourage children in all aspects and have an agreed approach to homework routines between both households.

Mental Health

4. Mental health

Parents and school should keep a close eye on the mental health and wellbeing of the child(ren), and the school should ensure that the child(ren) have access to pastoral support with a nominated member of staff at the school.

Sports and Hobbies

5. Sports and hobbies

Parents and school to ensure the child(ren) continue to participate in school extra-curricular activities as this is important to their wider well-being.

Why this is so important

When asked about the impact of parental separation on children, teachers have seen separation affecting:

1

Academic Performance

79%

of teachers reported an impact on academic performance.

2

School Attendance

79%

of teachers reported an impact on school attendance.

3

Mental Health

94%

of teachers reported an impact on children’s mental health.

The 5 Changes

Our survey shows that dealing with separation is a real safeguarding issue for children and with this information, we began thinking about what schools need to provide the best possible support for the children in their care.

1

Parents to keep school as an important safe space for children and not bring disagreements to school.

2

All schools to have clearly communicated separation policies in place.

3

Educational professionals to have training and resources available to understand children’s rights and needs in the context of separation and school.

4

All schools to have nominated safeguarding leads for separation to best support children during this time.

5

Parents and schools to embrace the five to thrive principles to make a practical difference to young people experiencing family change.

Parent and Teacher Resources

We realised that we needed to help parents to understand how they separate is so important to the wellbeing of, and outcomes for, their children.

So, we set about about creating resources to better support teachers, parents and children through their journey. The resources are all available here.

“By providing guidance and resources for teachers and parents alike this Parents Promise initiative will make a real practical difference to the lives of children in the UK.”

Sir Andrew McFarlane

Make the Parents Promise

Make a positive commitment to your children today, in case of a relationship breakdown tomorrow. You will receive a personalised downloadable PDF certificate.

For advice on how to separate with compassion, or if you are currently experiencing difficulties and distress around these issues and need further support, a list of helpful organisations is below.